After their request to move to Canada and step away from their positions as senior members of the royal family was made public, Harry says he sent an e-mail to the three senior-most palace private secretaries asking for a meeting, which was initially rejected. However, after Meghan returned to Canada, “it was only then that the meeting happened.” Harry adds that it was “clear” to him that they had “planned” it so that Meghan would not be present.
“Imagine a conversation, a round table discussion, about the future of your life when the stakes are this high,” Meghan explains, “and you, as the mom and the wife and the target in many regards, are not invited to have a seat at the table.”
In that meeting with Queen Elizabeth II, his father and his brother, Harry reveals that he was presented with five options—”one being all in, no change, five being all out.” He says he “chose option three, half in, half out,” where the couple would “have our own jobs, but also work in support of the Queen.”
However, he adds that “It became very clear very quickly, that goal was not up for discussion or debate.”
And while his father and brother led the charge during meeting, Harry notes that his grandmother just “quietly” sat there, though he understood the position she was in, as Queen “her ultimate mission, goal slash responsibility, is the institution.”
Noting that the encounter was “really hard,” Harry says he left the meeting “without any solidified action plan,” and he believes his family still didn’t understand where he and Meghan were coming from.
“From their perspective, they had to believe that it was more about us and maybe the issues that we had,” Harry explains, “as opposed to their partner, the media, and themselves and that relationship that was causing so much pain for us. They saw what they wanted to see.”